Warning, rambling thoughts ahead.
We are, as Human Beings, a strange and somber lot. Strange, in that our behavior is often self defeating, somber in that we recognize that truth, and don’t bother to refute it. There are, it would seem, strange and mystical powers involved in our lives. Supreme beings that make us do all these things we should not be doing, would rather not do.
Now before I get too far along, I want to give a shout out to Paula, who kinda got me thinking about this, with her words of wisdom about how we are resistant to change, and that our resistance can be part of our learning process.
I’d be amiss if I didn’t mention there’s an entire world of thought available on why people are resistant to change, as well as how to get people to change.
What got me thinking as I was reading Paula’s Blog was a simple question I asked myself, ‘How have I changed as a person over the years?’. While Paula was writing about blogging, I opened the thought up to my larger worldview. I am, as most, just as resistant to change as the next, and if so, what have I done to grow as a person, what change have I faced and initiated to be different than I was yesterday?
The question isn’t so simple to answer. There are, variables, and a lot of ‘em.
Physical and emotional addictions are such variables. In both, there’s need and opportunity for change, and yet resistance is almost mandatory. Again, a strange and somber realization. War, crime, prejudices all strange and somber things that we can not seem to change even in the light of the destruction which follows in their path. These are human things.
As a human, I’ve had my share of personal demons. Lord yes, I have not always been this cool, great dude you know now.Truth is, I have a lot to be ashamed of, stuff I’d rather not talk about. You probably do too. In that respect, I’ve matured as a person and I’d like to think that’s part of the growing old cycle, but what’s next?
If I am by nature, not really wanting to change, I must be fine with who I am? If so, does that mean I don’t want to grow as a person? The right way to say it, I think, is ‘I like who I am as a person but I can learn to be even better’, which is strange because most people are emotional resistant to learning anything. Nothing is more evident of this than our current political discussions being held across numerous social platforms.
I’ve always considered myself a person of change, of growth and I’ve always attributed that growth to my belief that I have an open mind. Open to other ideas, open to new knowledge, open to other cultures. Being open isn’t about change though, as I think about it, as much as it is just being accepting of differences.
Yet, being accepting makes me a better person, doesn’t it?
I would like to wake up one morning, and answer the following, ‘Have I changed for the better since yesterday?’ but I can’t because I’m not so sure I can, much less if I should. Maybe, there is some mystical shit going on behind the scenes forcing us to do shit we don’t wanna do.
Whatever the final answers are, waking up and asking that question is a worthwhile effort, and I’ll continue to think about it, for a while.